Good fuckin gosh how about just a full week of not being either too awake, too asleep or too hurting to do a damn thing! Monday: Pretty decent day, until noon. Big time flare up of sudden bone pain and swelling even after lymphedema therapy. Swelling went down around 2200 hrs, which made it a bit more tolerable. Tuesday, sorta like a continuation of Monday afternoon, but with the kick of my right leg aching like there was no tomorrow. Although, in Tuesday's favor, I was awake all day, and slept really well all night. Wednesday, complete downer. Pain, aches, and riding the edge of another anxiety attack. Didn't sleep well during the day or night. Sucked major ass. Thursday went really well, until about until about 1630. Liz had somewhat of a windfall, so we agreed she buys something she wants for herself. Or something that she would like to have that the family can enjoy with her. She bout a 60" smart TV and new stand to put it on. Very cool, I like it. There is a story that goes along with that, from ohhh, 3 years ago. I mentioned to Liz, "We have this huge tax refund, I'll skip a Highland Game, and we'll buy a 60 or 70" HD tv. Put it in the living room, put the 50" in our room, and give Declan the 42" from the bedroom". Seemed good to me but I got this: "No, we are NOT putting a huge tv in the living room and definitely not putting that big assed TV from the living in our room!!" Well I'll be darned, that's pretty close to what happened. I had a bit of a laugh on Thursday. Anyway, around 1630, I got to feeling about 30 shades of icky. Helped Liz just a little on the building of the new stand, since she did most of it by herself. It's a very nice job that she did, and the TV looks fabulous. I can even read the crawler without having to squint (eyes are getting weaker, one of the reasons I'm going to have to give up driving). Friday started out great! Had good coffee with the boys, came home, slept, ingested lunch, slept. Went to get a massage at 1100 hrs, that was wonderful. Came home napped for certain after that, because every massage I've ever gotten just knocks me out. So I slept. I slept so much from 0600-2100 that I wasn't going to sleep Friday night at all. Turns out that was correct. I didn't sleep. Maybe a bit between 0730-1100. I also got sick and threw up Saturday around 1300. No reason was given, I started coughing, and about half way to stopping I just exploded. I'd not vomited like that in a quite a while. It really sucked the life out of me, all the way around. I got chills, stomach cramps, nausea. A decent fever for a while. Nearly had a panic attack, but got that kicked to the curb with the help of my daughter Addison. Creative, sharp, funny, and took care of dad. I love her to death.
So, things are just not going my way on Saturday at all. I'm dehydrated, but had taken in enough water to start getting over that. I've not coughed a lot, but what I am bringing up is pretty well blood filled, and has been for a couple of weeks. So, I get my second set set of formula in and cough once. It gives me that vurp taste, and just as I grab the suction to clear out my mouth, I explode. I've had some attacks of vomit before, but this one even surprised the shit out of me. The grandson didn't bat an eye though, he jumped up went and gathered his mom up "Pops threw up a lot and it's disgusting". He was right on both counts. I thought it was cool he didn't panic. Unlike my other trips to Rock's World of Throwing Up and Shaking I only tossed up this one time. I guess it figured if every thing in my stomach plus my socks and a pair of underwear was enough throwing up for one day.
So I stop being a high pressure internal cleaning machine and settle in for a warm shower, some ice water and a nap. Two out of three ain't bad. The shower and ice water were refreshing, but it seemed the nap just wasn't going to come along like I'd like. Most of that was from running a fever. I never took my temperature, but I think it got dang high a couple of times. I'd burn up for an hour or two, the beak out in a sweat and freeze for an hour or so. I kept adding water, and I kept getting a little better but never quite over it completely. I did finally nap a little, but I didn't try to get anymore formula in to me at all. My stomach was still too hinky for that. Addison rounded me up some Adivan and Pepto-Dismal and in an hour or so that had settled down. Still not food worthy but not doing full 360's either. That was a nice break. Not all that's left is shaky from my hands and legs. Which, in my case, normally says an anxiety thing. I couldn't take any more Ativan for another 5 hours, so I concentrated on keeping my breathing even and not being so leg achey and busy. This time I really do believe it was a dehydration thing making my legs want to wiggle like jello on acid.
Well that was my Saturday. I think it was some kind of bug, because I feel better at this time of the morning than I had for the last couple of days at the same time. I don't want to push it, so I'm going to get my day started with an infusion of my morning drugs and a good long nap.
Everyone take care, enjoy your day. Make it special, we are all only given a finite amount of days
Hugs and shit
